Man...every day it seems like things are going from bad to worse.
Lately, I have felt paralyzed by anxiety, fear, and worry. I have been stuck in a rut, just hoping to wake up tomorrow and see that everything has gone back to "normal" life as I know it. I've found that the stress of everything changing so rapidly has made me 'snappy' towards my children and husband.
And why? None of this is their fault. Instead of focusing on the things I should be, I'm constantly pouring over new information given to us to the point that my head feels like it could explode. In a way, all I've been trying to do is find someone or something to demonize in all of this. Who is the real enemy? What should I really be doing? What can I buy to best protect my family? Which politicians can I trust? Will this just usher in more freedoms being stripped away from Americans?
Let's just be real, it's a scary time right now! But God got a hold of my heart so gently last night and gave me such a peace that I've never quite known before.
I was watching a video posted from an end times guy that I like and he totally just hit the nail on the head of the whole situation. No, he wasn't saying this was caused by God or Satan. And no, he wasn't giving me tips on what to stock up on or what to do in an emergency. He simply said, "Christian, it's time to lean in. Stop fighting what God is trying to accomplish through you in this situation and LEAN INTO IT."
This whole time I've been fighting it. I'll start to pray, but as soon as I get on social media, my quieted heart starts pacing again. I'll act like I've completely given over to God and then a conversation with someone brings all of the emotions right back to the surface.
I've been in fight or flight mode and making hasty decisions. None of this is within my realm of control and I hate it. But guess what? It's not my job or your job to fix it. It's not my job to be in control. It's not my job to figure out why or what's next.
My job is to be a mom, a wife, and a teacher right now. To take care of my home & family in the best way I know how. To let my faith shine before all men, so that they may see HIS good works. I should be praying for revival everyday in this. My quiet time with God, in His Word and praying, should have preeminence over everything else.
Christian, God is going to use this time in your life and mine to prune us. To strengthen us. To discipline (not punish) us. To melt us into what HE wants us to be. Remember, we were born for such a time as this!
He knew we would endure this from the beginning of time! And it's comforting to me to know that so many others before me lived in trying times themselves...many of them, suffered war, persecution, disease and famine. Yet, when they leaned into God and His work in this world, amazing things happened as a result.
God is using all of this to change my heart. To give me His desires. To let my kingdom die and further His. It's all a part of His plan and I hope I never lose sight of that. 🙏🙏🙏
XO
D
No comments:
Post a Comment